After a break up.. how did you cope with only 50% custody.?

My boyfriend %26amp; I of 4 years have decided to call it quits. we have a 2 year old daughter. her father has moved into an apartment 3 miles away %26amp; wants to have the baby 50/50. I know thats a good thing because hes a father who actually wants to be around but I'm finding it very hard on myself only seeing her 50% of the time...i feel heartbroken how did you cope with this transition %26amp; how long did it take you to be ok with the whole situation? any words of advice, wisdom or ways to get over this are greatly appreciated.After a break up.. how did you cope with only 50% custody.?
I am going to give you a different point of view. My husband has 50/50 joint custody of his son with his ex. It is difficult. However, I can tell you that as long as both of you keep the child's best interest at heart, it will all work out. He is 8 and we have been doing this for 6 years. We get him one week, she gets him the next. We split holidays evenly, 7a-2p for one, 2p-9p for the other (he comes home to us if our week or goes home to her, if hers). For instance, this Thanksgiving he will be with us until 2p, go with her until 9p and come home to us because it falls on our week. Christmas is a little different. We alternate each year as to who gets him late Christmas Eve and has him through Christmas morning, but he will be home with us Christmas night because it is our week.





Also, anytime he wants to come home to us...she lets him. (He has brothers and a sister with us %26amp; is alone with her). She does usually, however, want to trade the time. Sometimes, she'll get him a day early or something.





We all work to make things as easy for him as possible. That is the key. Another thing to think about...when it comes time for her to need to be with her mother all the time (you know...puberty), she will be 12, which is old enough for her to legally decide where she wants to be. I hope this helps and that everything will work out for you.After a break up.. how did you cope with only 50% custody.?
You grow up and get over yourself. It didn't take me anytime...but then I had 60/40 custody because we lived 3,000 miles from her father, he got her during holidays and school vacations. I took the time she was gone to take care of ME. I would go to day spas, I joined a gym and when she was gone I had the time to utilize my memberships, I took classes, earned another degree, one summer I went on a cruise with other adult friends it was GREAT. I love my daughter but it was so liberating to be on my own.
I found it works quite well - gives both of you time away from the child for yourself. Just make sure you're in agreement on how to parent the child. The rules need to be the same in both households.
You and bf are not married apparently so you need to make this custody thing legal since you are separating. I am assuming his name is on your daughter's birth certificate right? You need to go to the Superior Court for your State that is in your County Self Serve Section. You need to file paper work for Joint Custody with a stipulation as to who has physical custody most of the time and child support. Being the child is 3yrs old you need to make sure it is in the best interest of the child. Adults sometime forget that and only think of themselves rather then how all this will affect the child. Remember at this age the child will not understand what is happening to mommy and daddy. It is important to do this as without legal documentation of custody could cause problems down the road between the both of you. Unfortunately most of the info out there has to do with divorcing parents but the same principals can apply so I will list several sites that you can refer to.