We've been together for nine months. 5 months ago we were deeply inlove. He became a little different since he wanst allowed to come over my house. My mom hates him so I started sleeping at his house like a few times a week. Its okay with his mom and sister because we all get along just fine and they understand our situation. Then a month after, he became cold. We fight most of the time over petty stuffs and several times he wants to break up with me but the problem is I dont want to. Finally, I got into my senses and told him I want to break up with him and he was the one who came running back to me. He told me not to leave him because he can't imagine himself with some other girl other than me. It moved me so i thought we were okay since then. Then he started being distant again. When we're around he its like he''s a total stranger to me. I asked him questions if he still loves me and he told me he do but then he doesnt love me whole heartedly like i am to him. He told me he, probably he was there to guide me in a relationship that i wont end up crying for the wrong guy and recover quickly. Just last night, i made up my mind. That I should be the one who will initiate the break up because I was really hurting deep down everytime I see him lie to me or hug me or kiss me and then suddenly be cold. He wont reply to my txts like he used to, never said i love you, blames me for being jelous when he hangs out to his new acquaintances which he never did. He was a loner when he met me. A whole month was a lie because I really thought he was serious on fixing our f*cked up relationship. But no, he was only there because he cant find a way to ease the burden that I will get when we break up. I feel miserable everytime I think about that he's still with me because I'm pathetic.
9 months ago he told me he was the luckiest guy on the planet and wont leave me because he loves me soo much. To be honest, I was the first girl he was so serious with. I dont know why so suddenly he fell out of love with me. I just cant accept the fact that its over. I cant imagine myself loving someone else other than him and be waaayyy too comfortable to be with. I'm so depressed because deep down I feel so crushed because he's soo different. I like him the way he is and he accepted me as I am. The problem is he doesnt love me anymore and I have to move on. I just want to get over this quicly and concentrate with my life. How long do you think it will take me to cope up with my first love?How long would it take me to cope up with my first love? (ten points for best answer)?
I don't think you ever really get over your first love, you just move on. It's really good that you're finally choosing to let it go though- that's the first step to moving on. You're right, if it's causing you pain and suffering, it's not worth it to hold on. I don't know how old you two are, but it sounds like you're a teenager and so is he. And teenagers change. You may have been perfect for each other 9 months ago, but both have you have gone through a lot since then and have different desires and ambitions, and the fact that things change is the only thing that doesn't change. You have to think a lot about this in order to forgive him and forgive yourself. You have to reconcile everything that happened and realize that you both learned from it and you're both better off for everything- the good and the bad. Once you do that, you can fully move on. I wouldn't recommend falling into someone else's arms until you've done that. Like I said, a first love is a memorable, lasting thing. You never really ';get over it'; or forget it. You just learn to accept it for what it Was, what it isn't anymore, and move on with that knowledge to use in the future. Good luck. It's really tough, but worth it. You'll be much happier when that burden is finally lifted.How long would it take me to cope up with my first love? (ten points for best answer)?
thanks! i gave the rest a thumbs up! :D
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Well this could take a while me being a boy i wouldn't know from a girls prospective but i have had a first love to and we broke up after what we had for each other. But i think the best way to get it over with stop texting him don't even try and be his friend because all it will make you do is want him more.
You might never get over your first love. I still get a little pang from my first love at that was well over ten years ago.
The only advise I can give you is that you will get over it and you will find someone else, even though right now your heart is broken and you can't see past tomorrow, but you will.
You need your friends and your family because they will always be there for you. No matter how mad you make them and they make you.
Give yourself a week to cry over this guy and wallow in your own misery, play it up big time. Then after your misery week you have to get back up on the horse and get back into life. Because life doesn't stop for love or anything else.
Every time you start to think of him, picture a big red stop sign and yell in your head stop! Then start thinking of anything else, movies, music, call your friends, read a book...It might seem silly but eventually your yell will become talking and your stop sign will become smaller and it will be easier to change the topic in your head.
Just give yourself a little bit of time and get back into life. Trust me you will find someone else that you love just as much. You will.
No longer than it takes to call me....no seriously I been through the same thing with my ex. ';taught me how to love';, couldn't have said it better she made me a better person, she brought a smile to my face practically on an hourly basis. Yet after 2 years, she decided she was better off without me. SHE couldn't break up so she got distant and pushed me away which made me man up and cut her loose. She tried sooooo soooo hard to stay friends, but in the end it just wasn't the same her feelings had evolved and I was old news. I know it wasn't her fault I just really in my heart felt like she was the girl I'd have kids with.....it was hell I still think about her, but all you can do is take comfort in the knowledge that maybe theres someone better and strive to be noticeable least I do....best thing you can do is have good friends, I'm TRYING to make some....
To be honest, it's different for everyone. I've seen my little cousin cry for like 4 years about this same guy. Everytime they break up it gets worse. I'm with my first love, so I really don't know what advice to give you...But I just want you to know that you don't need a boy to complete you. You are better than that. Every girl is. Sure, you're going to be depressed about it for awhile. I know I would be.
Don't act depressed around him, act like your really happy. It'll make him feel like ****, cause he'll be like ';damn, she's happier without me...';
You gotta let boys know that you are strong. That you can survive without them. Because they all think that women are just there to depend on them, and that's bullcrap!
You will get through this, I promise. I know it seems like the end of the world now...but it will turn out fine in the end.
(:
i went through the (almost) same thing. it's really hard to lose your first love especially after such a long time. and yes they are going to change i know you love him ALOT but also remember he is your FIRST love! that means there will be more! my best advice for you is to try to remain friends even if you're not very close out first. it's a proven fact that it takes half the time you went out with someone to get over them! so hang on! you'll find someone really awesome who your mom approves of soon enough :) and wait to start a relationship when you're positive you have NO MORE FEELINGS for your ex. i know it's really hard just don't give up! good luck hun!
p.s. if its not to much to ask PLEASE help me out?
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